AFTER 30

YOU KNOW... THERE REALLY IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BEING IN YOUR 20S AND YOUR 30S... I ALWAYS THINK ABOUT IT FROM TIME TO TIME AND LOOK BACK AT WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. JUST THE WAY I USE TO BE COMPARED TO NOW IS SO DIFFERENT. THE WAY YOU THINK, THE WAY YOU ACT, THE WAY YOU JUST ARE. YOU KNOW YOURE GOING TO GROW UP SOONER OR LATER, BUT YOU DONT REALLY NOTICE IT, MAYBE YOU DO, BUT WHEN A SIMILAR SITUATION COMES UP FROM WHEN YOURE YOUNGER AND NOW YOU REACT DIFFERENTLY YOU REALLY NOTICE IT. YOURE MORE GROWN UP NOW, AND MORE MATURE. YOU MIGHT WANT TO REACT THE SAME WAY BUT YOU REALIZE WHY WOULD YOU. LIKE SITUATION THAT I WOULD USE TO REACT TO OR WOULD TEST MY PATIENCE, NOW I JUST DONT BOTHER ANYMORE. I TEND TO JUST LET IT GO NOW, WHY WASTE YOUR TIME AND ENERGY ON SOMETHING SO STUPID. HOW ABOUT GOING OUT... I USE TO GO OUT ALL THE TIME, PARTIES WERE NOTHING. I HAVENT GONE PARTYING IN A WHILE, BUT EVEN JUST THINKING ABOUT IT SOMETIMES MAKES ME TIRED. USE TO HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY, NOW I JUST WANT TO NAP LOL. BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I USE TO BE LOUD. IVE TOLD YOU ALL BEFORE, THAT BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL I WAS VOTED THE LOUDEST PERSON IN SCHOOL. THESE DAYS SURE I CAN BE LOUD IF I HAVE TO, BUT GENERALLY IM PRETTY QUIET. IT JUST TAKES TOO MUCH TO BE LOUD. BEFORE I WOULD JUST SAY WHATS ON MY MIND, NEVER CARED WHAT PEOPLE THOUGHT. I STILL DO NOT CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK, BUT NOW I FILTER WHAT I SAY MORE. ITS JUST TOO MUCH WORK TO DEAL WITH THE SITUATION SOMETIMES AND THEN THERES JUST NOT CARING AND YOU JUST WANT THE CONVERSATION TO END. THERES JUST SO MUCH MORE BETWEEN 20S AND 30S. JUST LOOK HOW YOU USE TO DRESS AND NOW. IF I REALLY WANTED TO THIS WOULD BE A LONG LIST BUT YOU GET MY POINT. 20S YOU CARE TOO MUCH ABOUT EVERYTHING, AND AFTER 30 YOU JUST DONT CARE OR GIVE A F ANYMORE.

HOLY CRAP!!! THIS IS POST #400!!! THATS A POST A WEEK FOR OVER 7.5 YEARS!!! CONGRATS TO ME AND TO MANY MORE... MAYBE... LOL

RT

ADULTING...

WELL IVE BEEN ADULTING FOR A WHILE NOW AND ITS HARD... FOR THOSE WHO DONT UNDERSTAND, ADULTING IS BASICALLY DOING GROWN UP PEOPLE STUFF LIKE HAVING RESPONSIBILITIES, A JOB, RENT AND BILLS TO PAY, AND ALL THOSE LOVELY THINGS THAT GROWN UPS GET THE PLEASURE OF HAVING. IVE SORTA TALKED ABOUT THIS BEFORE HERE AND THERE BUT IT REALLY HIT ME HARD WHEN I STARTED BUYING BABY STUFF FOR FRIENDS KIDS... WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT I WOULD BE THE ONE TO BE DOING THESE KINDS OF THINGS... BEING A GROWN UP IS HARD... IT TAKES TIME AND MONEY AND YOU NEVER HAVE ENOUGH OF EITHER. HAVING RESPONSIBILITIES IS STRESSFUL!!! IT REALLY MAKES YOU THINK ABOUT YOURSELF AND WHERE YOU ARE IN LIFE AND WHAT YOU REALLY WANT AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO. GROWING UP YOU HAVE ALL THESE DREAMS AND GOALS OF BEING A SPY OR AN ACTOR OR A DOCTOR, ONLY TO GROW UP AND REALIZE THAT ITS NOT POSSIBLE OR YOU JUST CANT DO IT OR THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO DO CANT PAY THE BILLS. ITS EVEN WORSE THESE DAYS SINCE EVERYTHING COSTS SO MUCH, HOW CAN YOU EVEN AFFORD TO DO ANYTHING? THERES JUST SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THIS TOPIC. IT ALL GOES BACK TO THE BOTTOM LINE OF ARE YOU HAPPY??? IF YOU ARE HAPPY WITH EVERYTHING THEN THATS GREAT, BUT THE ODDS ARE IF YOURE AN ADULT, YOU ARE NOT HAPPY. NOTHING EVER GOES YOUR WAY...AINT THAT RIGHT... LIFE WAS SO MUCH EASIER... NOT A CARE IN THE WORLD AND NOW IM WORRYING ABOUT BABY PRODUCT INSTEAD... YOU JUST HAVE TO GO WITH IT AND MAKE THE BEST OF IT.

I HAVE SO MUCH MORE TO WRITE ABOUT THIS BUT IM PASSING OUT... SOOOO UNTIL NEXT TIME :)

RT

LIVE SHOWS

SO I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT ALL THE SHOWS I HAVE GONE TO RECENTLY OR HEARD ABOUT. IM TALKING ABOUT CONCERTS, EVENTS, AND LIVE SPORTS. I DONT GO TO MANY CONCERTS BUT I HAVE BEEN TO A BUNCH FOR THE PEOPLE I LIKE A LOT, BUT I HAVE GONE TO MANY MANY MANYYYYYYYYY EVENTS, WHEN I SAY EVENTS I MEAN DJ SHOWS HAHA, AND TO QUTIE A FEW LIVE SPORTS. FOR BOTH CONCERTS AND EVENTS YOU ALREADY KNOW THEIR SONGS, YOUVE HEARD IT BEFORE THERES NOT MUCH NEW ABOUT IT. FOR BOTH CONCERTS AND SPORTS A LOT OF TIME YOU CAN WATCH IT ON TV OR ONLINE. SO FOR MOST OF THEM YOU HAVE EITHER HEARD IT BEFORE OR YOU CAN WATCH IT ELSEWHERE. THEN WHY IS IT THAT EVERYONE MAKES SUCH A BIG DEAL ABOUT GOING TO SEE IT LIVE...??? THE MAIN REASON IS THE ATMOSPHERE!!! WATCHING SOMETHING LIVE WITH FRIENDS OR FAMILY IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FROM JUST WATCHING OR LISTENING TO IT BY YOURSELF AT HOME. THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU AND THE ENERGY IN THE VENUE JUST BRINGS THE EMOTIONS AND ENERGY UP. BEING SURROUNDED BY PEOPLE WHO HAVE THE SAME INTERESTS JUST MAKES FOR A BETTER TIME. THERES BEEN TIMES WHERE IM WATCHING A HOCKEY GAME OR BASKETBALL GAME OR SOCCER GAME AT HOME BY MYSELF AND WHEN THEY SCORE ITS JUST LIKE OK GOOD FOR THEM, BUT WHEN IM AT THE GAME ITS LIKE THE WHOLE PLACE JUST ERUPTS AND SCREAMS LIKE THERES NO TOMORROW. SAME THING FOR A PENALTY... AT HOME I WOULD JUST BE LIKE MEH, BUT AT A GAME I WOULD YELL AND SWEAR. IT ALL JUST TIES IN TO THE PSYCHOLOGY OF GROUP BEHAVIOUR/HERD BEHAVIOUR AND HOW PEOPLE ALIKE ACT IN GROUP SETTINGS. A BIG PART OF GOING TO SHOWS THESE DAYS ARE MORE ABOUT SOCIAL STATUS THAN ACTUALLY GOING FOR THE SHOW ITSELF. PEOPLE POST ALL OVER SOCIAL MEDIA TELLING EVERYONE AND SHOWING EVERYONE WHERE YOU ARE, HOW CLOSE YOU ARE, EITHER YOU HAVE THE MONEY TO GO, OR WHO YOU KNOW. ITS ALL TOO TRUE THAT BEING ABLE TO GO TO SOMETHING THAT IS EXCLUSIVE OR SOLD OUT JUST MAKES THEM THINK IT ELEVATES THEM SOMEHOW. HONESTLY IVE DONE THE SAME THING BEFORE... IF YOU CHECK MY IG YOU CAN SEE A BUNCH OF THEM, BUT FOR ME I FEEL ITS MORE OF A JOURNAL OF MY LIFE... THEN AGAIN ITS NOT MUCH DIFFERENT OF TRYING TO LET PEOPLE KNOW WHAT OR WHERE I AM OR HAVE GONE. IT REALLY IS HUMAN NATURE ALWAYS TRYING TO ONE UP EACH OTHER, TRYING TO PROVE THAT THEY ARE BETTER, OR IN OTHER WORDS SHOW OFF LOL. NOT MUCH YOU CAN REALLY DO ABOUT THAT SINCE WE LIVE IN THE DIGITAL AGE AND WHERE SOCIAL MEDIA IS SO PREVALENT EVERYWHERE IN KEEPING EVERYONE CONNECTED. SNAPCHAT IS A PRIME EXAMPLE OF THIS AND PERISCOPE IS LIVE BROADCASTING TO THE WORLD WHERE YOU ARE. IT CAN ONLY GET WORSE IS WHAT I THINK... SO... WITH EVERYTHING SAID IM GOING TO A PARTY THIS WEEKEND AND IL MOST LIKELY HAVE PICTURES AND SNAPS UP ABOUT IT... AHEAHEHAHA

IN OTHER NEWS... IM STILL BLOCKED FROM FACEBOOK... I REALLY DONT NOTICE IT ANYMORE... I DONT GET CONSTANT NOTIFICATION FROM THEM SO THATS ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD. WORKS WORK, GOT A FEW DAYS OFF FOR CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR SO SHORT WEEK THIS WEEK AND NEXT. THATS GOOD SINCE ITS A MUCH NEEDED LITTLE BREAK. JUST BEEN GOING OVERDRIVE FOR THE PAST YEAR ALMOST AND NEED A LITTLE BIT OF A BREATHER. EVEN MY VACATION WAS BUSY... SO NOW I GET A CHANCE TO JUST HANG OUT AND CHILL A BIT WITH THE FAMILY AND FRIENDS. OH OH OH THE PAST MONDAY WAS THE ANNUAL COMPANY CHRISTMAS DINNER. IT WAS NICE AND EVERYONE HAD A GREAT TIME :) AS THE SOCIAL COORDINATOR I HAD 5 GAMES SET UP, TALKED A BIT, AND DELIVERED THE SECRET SANTA PRESENTS. IT WAS GREAT JUST RELAXING WITH EVERYONE AND STUFFING OUR FACES LOL.

WELL CHRISTMAS IS ON FRIDAY SO I WISH ALL MY READERS AND THEIR FAMILIES A MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HOPE YOU ALL HAVE A WONDERFUL HOLIDAY :)

RT

THE FIRST STEP IS ALWAYS THE HARDEST

JUST LIKE EVERYTHING IN LIFE, IT ALL STARTS WITH THAT FIRST STEP. THINK ABOUT IT... WAKING UP IN THE MORNING YOU CAN DECIDE TO SNOOZE IT OR WAKE UP AND GO BRUSH UP. DECIDING WHETHER TO EAT SOMETHING EASY LIKE CEREAL OR MAKE SOME BACON AND EGGS. DECIDING TO START READING A BOOK, LEARNING A NEW LANGUAGE, OR TRYING SOMETHING NEW FOR THE FIRST TIME THAT FIRST STEP IS THE ACT OF ACTUALLY GOING FORWARD AND DOING SOMETHING. EVERYTHING STARTS OFF LIKE THAT AND IT JUST CONTINUES ON UNTIL ITS SECOND NATURE. A BABYS FIRST STEP IS PHYSICALLY THE HARDEST FIRST STEP WE WILL TAKE. LATER IN LIFE DECIDING TO GO TO SCHOOL OR GO BACK TO SCHOOL. FINALLY BUYING A CAR, MOVING OUT. DECIDING TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP, GETTING MARRIED, BUYING A HOUSE, HAVING KIDS, ALL THESE ARE STEPS AND NONE OF WHICH COME EASY. WHAT MOTIVATES YOU ENOUGH TO MAKE YOU TAKE THAT FIRST STEP? THE FACT THAT YOU HAVE A JOB? PERHAPS YOU HAVE RESPONSIBILITIES TO TAKE CARE OF AND ONLY YOU CAN DO IT. WHATEVER IT IS, YOU MADE THE DECISION TO TAKE THAT STEP TO DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO. FOR ME, PERSONALLY, THE REASON IS CHANGE. I WANT A CHANGE IN SOMETHING, I CANT JUST KEEP DOING WHAT IM DOING. I CONSCIOUSLY KNOW THAT SOMETHING HAS TO CHANGE BEFORE OTHER CHANGES CAN OCCUR. EVERYTHING HAPPENS IN STEPS. AFTER I FINISHED SCHOOL I REALLY DIDNT KNOW WHERE TO GO, I MEAN I GOT A JOB BUT IT WASNT WHERE I WANTED TO END UP. I STARTED LOOKING AT SCHOOL AGAIN AND IT WAS HARD TO ACTUALLY TAKE THAT STEP. ESPECIALLY AFTER BEING IN SCHOOL SO LONG, HAVING STUDENT LOANS, AND BASICALLY NOT LIVING MY LIFE THE WAY I WANTED. DEBATED A LOT, AND TOOK A WHILE LOOKING AT WHAT I WANTED TO GO INTO. EVENTUALLY FOUND SOMETHING I LIKED AND KNEW COULD MAKE A LIVING AND JUST WENT FOR IT. TOOK THAT STEP AND REGISTERED AND WENT THROUGH WITH THE PROGRAM. EVERYTHING IS ABOUT THAT FIRST STEP, IF YOU NEVER TRY, HOW WILL YOU EVER KNOW? PEOPLE THESE DAYS ARE JUST TOO COMFORTABLE AND DONT WANT TO LEAVE THEIR COMFORT ZONE. NOTHING EVER WORTH DOING WAS EASY... IF IT WAS THEN EVERYONE WOULD HAVE DONE IT ALREADY. THEN AGAIN A LOT OF PEOPLE THESE DAYS ARE JUST AFRAID TO TRY ANYTHING, NOT KNOWING IF THEY COULD DO IT OR MAKE IT. THEY ARE JUST AFRAID OF WHAT THEY DONT KNOW, SO TO NOT BE AFRAID THEY JUST STAY WHERE THEY ARE AND NEVER TAKING THAT STEP. FEAR OF FAILURE, FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN, FEAR OF DISAPPOINTMENT... NONE OF THESE FEARS ARE REAL... THEY ARE ALL IN YOUR HEAD AND IF YOU CAN GET PAST THAT FEAR, THEN YOU WILL TRULY BE ABLE TO DO ANYTHING YOU WANT. IF YOU ALL REMEMBER A FEW MONTHS BACK FOR MY BDAY POST I MENTIONED THAT I GAVE MYSELF A DEADLINE OF 1 YEAR. NOT MANY PEOPLE KNOW WHAT IT IS AND IVE ONLY TOLD A FEW PEOPLE. ITS A HEFTY GOAL THAT I SET FOR MYSELF, AND ODDS ARE THAT IT CANT BE DONE IN JUST 1 YEAR, BUT LIKE I SAID... IF I NEVER TRY, HOW WILL I EVER KNOW? RIGHT??? THE ENTIRE TIME IVE BEEN WANTING TO START AND I KEEP TELLING MYSELF THAT IM GOING TO START... AND A DAY GOES BY... WEEKS... MONTHS... I KEEP SAYING IM TIRED FROM WORK, OR IM GOING OUT, OR AFTER THIS TV SHOW, OR IM JUST LAZY... AND UP TO A FEW DAYS AGO I STILL HAVENT STARTED... THATS ABOUT 100 DAYS GONE... BUT NOW I CAN ACTUALLY SAY THAT I TOOK THAT FIRST STEP, I TOOK THAT HARDEST STEP AND MOVED FORWARD. NOW THAT I HAVE STARTED, ITS NOT THAT HARD TO CONTINUE, JUST HAVE TO KEEP ON GOING, AND KEEP AT IT. WHO KNOWS... MAYBE IF I KEEP THIS UP THAT 1 YEAR DEADLINE MIGHT ACTUALLY HAPPEN LOL. HAVING SPENT THIS MUCH TIME, MONEY, AND ENERGY ON THIS ALREADY MY ONLY CHOICE IS TO STICK THIS OUT AND SEE WHERE IT LEADS TO. IF IT WORKS OUT THEN GREAT, IF IT DOESNT THEN AT LEAST I CAN SAY I TRIED AND I KNOW. IN THE END NO ONE CAN DO IT FOR YOU. YOU HAVE TO DECIDE FOR YOURSELF IF YOU WANT TO TAKE THAT STEP. ITS GOING TO BE HARD, ITS GOING TO BE SLOW, AT TIMES YOU MIGHT FEEL LIKE GIVING UP, BUT IN THE END JUST REMEMBER, HARD WORK ALWAYS PAYS OFF. SO NO MATTER HOW HARD THAT FIRST STEP MIGHT BE... WHATEVER YOUR SITUATION MAY BE... DO IT FOR YOURSELF AND TAKE IT.

RT