THAT HEADSPACE...

ONCE AGAIN INEVITABLY YOU WILL REACH THAT HEADSPACE WHERE YOU WONDER... WONDER ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE DOING... WONDER WHERE YOU ARE GOING... WONDER WHAT IT ALL MEANS... ITS A NATURAL PART OF LIFE, AND IN EACH OF YOUR MINDS A STORM IS BREWING AND A BATTLE IS WAGED. HOW DO YOU LOOK FOR ANSWERS AND WHERE DO YOU DO THAT... ANSWERS THAT CANT BE ANSWERED BY ANYONE BUT YOURSELF. IVE WROTE ABOUT THIS BEFORE BUT LIKE CLOCKWORK THESE QUESTIONS WILL CREEP BACK INSIDE YOUR HEAD AND MAKE YOU WONDER... MAKE YOU QUESTION IT ALL... QUESTION EVERYTHING YOU KNOW AND EVERYTHING YOU ARE. NO ONE CAN ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS AND THATS WHATS FRUSTRATING... EVERYONE IS ON THEIR OWN PATH... THEIR OWN JOURNEY... AND NO ONE KNOWS WHERE IT BEGINS OR ENDS. SOME PEOPLE FIGURE IT ALL OUT QUICKLY AND OTHERS TAKE A LIFETIME TO KNOW, AND SOME WILL NEVER FIND OUT THE ANSWER. PEOPLE TAKE TIME OFF TO FIND THEMSELVES AND SOME ARE LUCKY ENOUGH TO FIND THE ANSWERS THEY ARE LOOKING FOR. ANSWERS CAN COME FROM ANYWHERE, IT MIGHT BE SOMETHING YOU READ OR SEE OR HEAR, IT COULD BE A MEMORY, OR IT COULD COME TO YOU IN A DREAM AND WHEN YOU WAKE UP, ALL IS CLEAR. ANSWERS COULD COME FROM INSPIRATION, PASSION, LOVE, HATE, HAPPINESS, SADNESS, AND A MILLION DIFFERENT FEELINGS AND PLACES. POETS AND PHILOSOPHERS HAVE ALL TRIED TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS AND EVEN TO THEM THE ANSWERS ARE NOT CLEAR. TOO MANY QUESTIONS IN LIFE AND TOO LITTLE TIME TO FIGURE IT ALL OUT AND WHAT IT ALL MEANS. I GUESS IL LOOK WITHIN AND SEE IF IT COMES TO ME IN MY DREAM TONIGHT. I JUST NEED TO GET LOST TO FIND MYSELF. IN THE END, DONT WE ALL JUST WANT ANSWERS TO THE QUESTIONS THAT WE HAVE???

RT

DOING THE RIGHT THING!!!

DO YOU ALWAYS DO THE RIGHT THING??? WHAT IS RIGHT ANYWAY??? RIGHT IS SUCH A SUBJECTIVE TERM. WHAT ONE PERSON SEES AS RIGHT COULD BE TOTALLY WRONG TO ANOTHER. SOMETIMES IM NOT SURE IF WHAT IM DOING IS RIGHT OR NOT... IN THE MOMENT OF THINGS IT SEEMS RIGHT, IT IS ONLY AFTER THAT YOU REALIZE THAT IT MIGHT BE WRONG... IT IS WRONG... I CANT HELP MYSELF, I TRY TO DO THE RIGHT THING AND SOMETIMES LOOKING BACK WHY DID I DO IT? WHY COULDNT I JUST HAVE DONE IT WRONG, WHY BE THE GOOD GUY AND DO THE RIGHT THING. THERE IS NO REAL PRIZE FOR GOING THE RIGHT THING, YOU JUST FEEL BETTER. SOMETIMES THE RESULT OF DOING THE RIGHT THING IS EVEN WORSE THAN DOING THE WRONG THING... SO WHATS THE POINT? IT ALL JUST ENDS WITH WHAT YOU CAN LIVE WITH. IF YOU CAN LIVE WITH YOURSELF DOING IT WRONG, THEN ODDS ARE YOU WILL DO IT THAT WAY. SOMEHOW IT TURNS OUT THAT I WANT TO DO THE RIGHT THING AND BE ABLE TO EXPLAIN AND LIVE WITH MYSELF... BUT SOMETIMES I REALLY WISH I DID THINGS ANOTHER WAY. SOMETIMES ITS JUST SO HARD TRYING TO DO THE RIGHT THING. YOU TRY TRY TRY AND YOU JUST CANT DO IT. SOMEHOW TRYING SO HARD TO DO THE RIGHT THING YOU END UP MESSING IT UP... LIFES FUNNY LIKE THAT, AND WHEN YOU REALLY DONT CARE ANYMORE, THATS WHEN THINGS GO RIGHT AND WORK THEMSELVES OUT... FROM WHEN WE WERE YOUNG, WE WERE ALWAYS TAUGHT TO DO THE RIGHT THING... BUT WE SEE ALL THOSE WHO DONT FOLLOW THAT RULE DO SO MUCH BETTER THAT MAKES US RETHINK IT. EVERYTHING JUST WORKS OUT FOR THOSE PEOPLE... BUT REMEMBER KARMA ALWAYS COMES BACK SO THINK OF IT IN THE LONG RUN. JUST DO WHAT YOU WANT TO... IF YOU CAN LIVE WITH YOURSELF... BUT IF YOU DONT DO IT SOMEONE ELSE WILL... SO WHY NOT YOU BETTER THAN THEM??? THAT LAST BIT DOESNT REALLY APPLY TO EVERYTHING... AND IT ALWAYS GOES BACK TO WHERE THERE IS ALWAYS AN EXCEPTION TO EVERY RULE LOL.

NOTHING NEW BUT THE SAME OLD WORK AND LIFE. STARTED A FEW NEW TV SHOWS AND BURNING THROUGH THEM QUITE QUICKLY LOL. ITS 2 WEEKS INTO MY 366 DAY DEADLINE AND I REALLY SHOULD NOT HAVE FOUND THOSE SHOWS... IL GET RIGHT BACK TO THE WORK SOON ENOUGH... LOL

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DAY 5 OF 366

WELL I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE NICE TO JUST RECAP THE PAST WEEK AND SEE HOW PROGRESS IS GOING... IT IS GOING... SLOW........................ VERY SLOW............................... LOL... BETWEEN BEING CAUGHT UP WITH WORK, SOCCER, AND SOME BDAY CELEBRATIONS I DIDNT REALLY GET A CHANCE TO REALLY BEGIN ANYTHING. I REALLY DONT THINK IL BE ABLE TO START TILL THIS MAD RUSH IS OVER. TOO MUCH TO DO RIGHT NOW AND TOO TIRED WHEN IM BACK HOME. BY THE TIME IM FINALLY HOME I JUST WANT TO EAT AND CHILL OUT THEN GO TO SLEEP. BDAY WAS NICE, JUST HAD DINNER WITH THE CLOSE GROUP OF FRIENDS AND THEN WENT BOWLING... WHERE THEY SCREWED UP AND NOW I HAVE TO CALL THEIR GM TO COMPLAIN AND GET MY MONEY BACK. THE ZONE HAS NEVER BEEN THIS BIG OF A HASSLE, THE PEOPLE THERE THAT NIGHT WAS COMPLETELY USELESS AND DIDNT EVEN UNDERSTAND THEIR OWN SYSTEM. THE FACT THAT I HAD TO EXPLAIN TO THEM WHAT THEY DID WRONG AND HOW ILLOGICAL THEY WERE ACTUALLY MADE ME FEEL DUMBER... NOT TO MENTION IT WAS MY FREAKING BDAY!!! ANYWAYS I GOTTA DEAL WITH THAT SOON. HUNG OUT WITH THE FAMILY ONE DAY AND HAD DIM SUM THE OTHER. OH I DID HAVE A SOCCER GAME LAST WEEK AND IT WAS GREAT. WE WON AND I SHOULD HAVE SCORED LIKE 3 GOALS!!! INSTEAD I WAS THE UNLUCKIEST GUY EVER... LONG STORY SHORT I KICK THE BALL AND IT HITS THE RIGHT POST, WHEN THE GOALIE TURNS TO LOOK AT THE BALL, THE BALL RICOCHETS OFF THE POST AND HITS HER SQUARE IN THE FACE, THEN THE BALL BOUNCES OFF HER FACE AND HITS THE SAME POST AGAIN, AND THEN BOUNCES OFF THE GOALIES HAND AND ROLLS ON THE LINE BUT NOT IN... ARE... YOU... KIDDING... ME..........   THAT SURE WAS UNLUCKY... SIGH... WELL ANYWAYS GONNA GO GET SOME SLEEP, FINISH OFF THE WEEK STRONG AND HOPEFULLY START ON WHAT REALLY MATTERS.

RT

366 DAYS UNTIL DEADLINE

SO GUESS WHAT!!! IT'S THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN :) YES!!! ITS MY BIRTHDAY!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE ITS ANOTHER YEAR THAT SOON... IT SEEMED LIKE YESTERDAY THAT I SAID IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY POST AND NOW HERE WE GO AGAIN. LOOKING BACK IT WAS A BIG YEAR!!! I WAS A REAL GROWN UP ADULT... HAHA. ITS THE FIRST YEAR THAT IVE ACTUALLY WORKED FULL TIME THE WHOLE YEAR AT THE SAME JOB, I ALSO FINALLY FINISHED ALL MY SCHOOLING, AND TONS OF RANDOMNESS HAPPENED THROUGHOUT. FRIENDS WERE MADE, EVENTS WERE ATTENDED, AND I LEARNED A LOT ABOUT MYSELF THIS YEAR. I REALLY FOUND OUT WHAT I WAS MADE OF, AND NOW LOOKING FORWARD TO THE COMING YEAR I GOT BIGGER DREAMS AND BIGGER PLANS. IM AT THE AGE WHERE I REALIZE I HAVE TO BE MORE GROWN UP AND THINGS ARENT EASY LIKE THE WAY THEY WERE BEFORE. I CANT KEEP DOING WHAT IM DOING AND IN ORDER TO CONTINUE I NEED TO CHANGE. I HAVE TO BE BETTER, I HAVE TO LEARN MORE, I HAVE TO BE DIFFERENT. WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE TITLE... 366 DAYS UNTIL DEADLINE... FROM MY BIRTHDAY THIS WEEKEND I AM GIVING MYSELF 1 YEAR TO GET TO WHERE I WANT TO BE. ITS AN AMBITIOUS GOAL AND I KNOW THERES A LOT OF HARD WORK AHEAD OF ME IF I WANT TO BE ABLE TO ACHIEVE WHAT I WANT IN THAT SHORT TIME, BUT THERES NO POINT IN JUST THINKING AND HOPING FOR SOMETHING TO HAPPEN. ITS 366 DAYS SINCE ITS A LEAP YEAR THIS YEAR LOL SO TECHNICALLY I GET A BONUS DAY ACTUALLY LOL. I FIGURE THERES NO BETTER TIME THAN NOW AND SINCE ITS MY BIRTHDAY, THE MORE REASON TO START. YOU CAN ALL HOLD ME TO THIS AND I WILL LET YOU ALL KNOW HOW IT GOES IN A YEAR. WELL... IM GOING TO KEEP THIS BLOG GOING SO I GUESS YOU WILL STILL GET UPDATES AND I HOPE THAT THROUGH THE YEAR THE UPDATES WILL ONLY GET BETTER AND BETTER TOWARDS MY GOAL. THIS IS GOING TO BE MY YEAR AND JUST LIKE I HAVE SAID IN MANY OF MY PREVIOUS POSTS, THERES NO ONE ELSE THAT CAN DO IT FOR YOU EXCEPT FOR YOURSELF, IN THE END YOURE THE ONLY ONE THAT MATTERS, NEVER GIVE UP ON WHAT YOU WANT, DO WHAT IT TAKES TO GET TO WHERE YOU WANT TO BE, HARD WORK PAYS OFF, AND NEVER LET ANYTHING STAND IN YOUR WAY OF OBTAINING YOUR GOALS AND DREAMS. EVERYONE IS CAPABLE OF DOING ANYTHING, AND IM GOING TO START TAKING MY OWN ADVICE AND DO WHAT I WANT. I REALLY CANT WAIT TO SEE WHERE I WILL BE IN A YEAR, AND I CANT WAIT TO SHARE WITH YOU ALL TOO :) SO LET THE COUNTDOWN BEGIN!!!

AUGUST IS ALWAYS THE BEST MONTH OF THE YEAR, BESIDES THE MASSIVE AMOUNT OF FRIENDS BDAYS THAT I HAVE, THE SUN IS OUT AND TIME TO PLAY :) JUST THE OTHER DAY I HAD THE MOST PACKED DAY EVER... BARELY SLEPT SINCE I PARTIED THE NIGHT BEFORE... WENT TO DENNYS IN THE MORNING, THEN HIT UP THE GOLF RANGE, GRABBED SOME STARBUCKS, THEN WENT TO SING KARAOKE FOR 3...4... HOURS..., GRABBED SOME DINNER AT QUIZNOS LOL, WENT GO-CARTING, AND ENDED THE NIGHT UP WITH SOME BOWLING HAHA. THAT WAS A LONG DAY AND MOST OF IT WAS RANDOM, WE DIDNT END UP WHERE WE WANTED TO FOR DINNER BUT ENDED UP WITH SOME RANDOM GOOD TIMES INSTEAD. ITS WAS A LONG WEEKEND AS WELL SO HAD BBQ FOR ONE OF MY FRIENDS BDAY. LASTLY AND OBVIOUSLY I WOULD MAKE SURE THAT I MENTION IS THAT TOMORROW IM GOING TO WATCH THE NEW DRAGONBALL MOVIE!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! DRAGONBALL Z: RESURRECTION "F" AHHHHH FRIEZA IS BACK... AGAIN... HAHA. I GREW UP WITH DRAGONBALL AND HAVE TONS OF FIGURES AND SUCH AT HOME TOO. I ALSO CANT WAIT TIL I GO BACK TO HK IN OCT SO I CAN GET MORE STUFF TO ADD TO THE COLLECTION. OH OH OH YA SO DID I MENTION I FINALLY FIGURED OUT WHERE IM GOING FOR VACA? WELL IM GOING TO TELL YOU AGAIN EITHER WAY IF I DID HAHA. TICKET FROM HERE TO CHINA TO HK BACK TO CHINA TO HOME, PLUS 7 DAYS TRIP IN CHINA, 5 STAR HOTELS, 3 MEALS A DAY, ALL TRAVEL AND ENTRANCE FEES PAID FOR, GUESS HOW MUCH??? ITS REALLY CHEAP!!! WHATEVER YOU ARE THINKING, GO AHEAD AND HALF THAT AND PROB TAKE SOME MORE OFF WHAT YOU ARE THINKING. YA!!! THAT CHEAP!!! ITS NUTS!!! SO CRAZY THAT HOW COULD WE NOT GO!!! IVE ONLY BEEN TO 1 OF THE LOCATIONS THAT THEY ARE INCLUDING IN THE TRIP BUT WHO CARES, SINCE I HAVENT BEEN TO THE OTHER PLACES AND THAT ITS SUPER CHEAP!!! THIS ENDED UP AS A FAMILY TRIP ALONG WITH MY AUNT AND COUSIN AND SOME OTHER FAMILY FRIENDS. THEN I GET SOME TIME IN HK TO CHILL WITH MY FRIENDS THERE. IM LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS VACA CAUSE I REALLY NEED IT. JUST NEED SOME TIME TO GET AWAY FROM IT ALL AND RELAX AND JUST RECHARGE. ITS BEEN A LONG YEAR... SO I ALSO HAVE THAT TO LOOK FORWARD TO :) WELL THATS ALL FOR NOW, SEE YOU ALL NEXT WEEK WHERE I WILL BE ANOTHER YEAR WISER................. AHEAHEHAHEA

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